a sharpie

The sharpie with retractable point my sister gave me finally dies.

I kinda liked that sharpie.

I go to Office Max to get a new sharpie.

I study the entirety of the "writing instruments" display. Twice. No sharpies.

Then I notice they're in their own kiosk in the middle of the isle.

A sales woman cruises by and asks if I have any questions.

Yeah, I think, I got questions, like, "Why is life the way it is?" But instead I say, "No, thanks, I found what I’m looking for."

She disappears.

But there is not "a" sharpie in the display.

The closest thing is a four-pack for $6.79.

I check the display again.

Nope, only the four-pack.

I am nearly resigned to take the four-pack.

The sales woman cruises by again. She gives me a glance.

I ask, "Is it possible to get just one sharpie?”

"Yes," she says, "we moved that display up front."

I go up front.

There they are. Individual sharpies.

They are 2 for $1.00.

I take one to the checkout.

The woman scans it.

"$1.83," she says.

"The sign says 2 for $1.00," I say.

She looks puzzled.

She walks around to the display.

She reads the sign to me, "2 for $1.00, or…" she squints at the fine print, "1 for $1.67."

I take another sharpie.

She scans them and says, "That'll be $1.08."

Do the math. Everything makes perfect sense.

Gordon Bunker