A Friend, Lost

(Please click on the title for a reading aloud by the author.)

Tuesday was a hard day. Wrapped in my own dark cloud, that morning I would tell a friend, “there’s been too much disappointment.” And I meant it. I would later learn Tuesday was also the day my friend Mark killed himself.

Mark and I used to be co-workers. Mark was in his twenties, married and the father of two children. We were never all that close, but I loved the guy. He was a dear person. The crew we were a part of pulled off some great work together, and sure did have some fun doing it. I had little glimpses that at some point in his life he might have been treated harshly, but he was an admirable and skilled guy, putting in a good honest effort, facing the challenges and doing pretty well.

But so much of and perhaps the most intense of our suffering is private. I have been told those who are serious about and actually commit suicide typically do not talk about their troubles, or their suicidal tendencies. So the tragedy is compounded in that the people who love them and would give anything to help are not in the know.

I feel so for Mark. Something in his life was unbearable, something or some awful accumulation drove him beyond his ability to cope. There’s now an empty place in this world, so many of us wish with all our hearts was still filled with Mark. I feel for his family. What has happened is a great loss.

Gordon Bunker